A Thousand Words

By Joey Del Santo

CHARACTERS:
MATT, a college freshman
CHRISTOPHER, a college freshman and MATT’s boyfriend

TIME:
The continuous present.

PLACE:
Matt’s dorm room.

Scene: Matt’s Dorm Room

At Rise: MATT is typing at his desk. CHRIS is lying on MATT’s bed, scrolling on his phone.

(CHRIS throws his phone down on the bed.)

CHRIS
Are you done yet?

MATT
No.

CHRIS
Are you anywhere close to being done?

MATT
No.

CHRIS
Will you be anywhere close to being done anytime soon?

MATT
No.

CHRIS
I guess I won’t be either.

(He picks up his phone, scrolls for a minute then puts it back down on his lap.)

CHRIS(cont’d)
How can you be typing so much and so fast and not be close to being done? How many words do you have?

(MATT highlights the text and checks word count.)

MATT
Two-forty-two.

CHRIS
Of how many?

MATT
One thousand.

CHRIS
Definitely not going to be done for a very long time.

MATT
Definitely. I maybe here all night. All year even.

(CHRIS flops his head back onto the pillow.)

MATT(cont’d)
Why don’t you go see Gabby or something?

CHRIS
No. I want to be with you.

MATT
Well I kind of think that you’re with me right now but I’m not really with you.

CHRIS
Yeah.

(Beat.)

How many?

MATT
Huh?

CHRIS
How many words?

MATT
Oh. Um, Two-sixty-four.

(Beat.)

CHRIS
How many fish is my life worth?

MATT
What?

CHRIS
How many fish is my life worth?

MATT
I’m working.

CHRIS
Please. How many fish is my life worth?

(MATT stops typing.)

MATT
How am I even supposed to answer that?

CHRIS
It’s like... how many fish would there have to be for you to save the fish over me?

MATT
I don’t know. A lot?

CHRIS
Give me a number.

MATT
Three thousand.

(CHRIS is visibly hurt.)

MATT(cont’d)
What? Is that not enough?

CHRIS
I was thinking more like a million.

MATT
Okay. A million.

(MATT goes back to typing. CHRIS is still upset. MATT stops typing again.)

MATT(cont’d)
Where did you even get the idea to ask me that?

CHRIS
TikTok.

MATT
You have TikTok now?

CHRIS
Gabby does. And Gabby asked me.

MATT

(Shaking his head.)

Okay.

(MATT goes back to typing. It stays uncomfortably quiet.)

MATT(cont’d)

You’re really upset.

CHRIS

No. I’m not.

(Beat.)

How many?

MATT
I told you. A million.

CHRIS
No. How many words?

MATT
Oh. Two-fifty-nine.

CHRIS
That’s less than you had before.

MATT
I know. I had to go back and rewrite. That sentence was too complex.

(CHRIS exhales heavily.)

MATT(cont’d)
What?

CHRIS
Nothing.

MATT
No. It’s something. What is it?

CHRIS
It’s just... how long have you known about this paper?

MATT
A while.

CHRIS
And when’s it due?

MATT
Tomorrow at noon.

CHRIS
And when did you start working on it?

MATT
Tonight.

(Beat.)

I always do that. You know that. You know that’s how I am.

CHRIS
I know. It’s just starting to feel like there’s always a thousand words between you and me.

MATT
There isn’t. There’s only seven-hundred-forty-one. Remember?

CHRIS
You know that’s not what I mean. We’re not as close as we were before.

(MATT gets up and sits beside CHRIS on the bed.)

MATT

We’re close now.

CHRIS

(Coldly.)

Finish your paper.

(MATT goes back to his desk.)

MATT
If I could... I would fill this essay with a thousand words about you and me.

CHRIS
If you can find that many.

(MATT is about to start typing again, but he hesitates.)

MATT

Find me a million fish and I’ll find you a thousand words.

(CHRIS smiles.

He gets up and wraps his arms around MATT holding him for a minute and then
pulling away and smiling again..)

The End.